Merry the Christmas!!

To ol my near and dear Pans

On this wery pestiwe and joyus day op ol days, Gossip Aiya would like to wish you ol "Merry Christmas" - or as one vocabularitically challenged radio stashun talling, "Merry Kissmas". I set alarm today at midnight to wake up wipe and wish Merry Christmas, but bloody woman gawe me a tight slap and sent me on my merry way only.

I would olso like to take this opportunity to thank ol pans in the Rajapakistan and in the many corners op the world por kind pollowing and paithfully reading ol this bollocks i am posting ewery so opten in warious stages op drunkenness. I hope you are lauping as much when reading as I laup when I see Isuru Malli getting chased by mad dogs down Nawam Mawatha.

Today plan is to hammer bothal op coconut wine (brought by Nondi Dawid and not by coconut mafia) and put a paduru party with ol tree wheel buggers prom Maharagama tree wheel istand. Then we is to go around colombo in tree wheels, go near rasthiyadu buggers on side op road and throw crackers at them and laup. Ewery year these soththa buggers throwing throwing as I am going on hire so this year we hau decided to giu them taste op their own medicine.

In conlushun, Gossip Aiya would like to end with sapety message to ol pans. By ol means drink. By ol means driwe. But please do not drink and driwe. Espeshally on these roads - ip you hit pothole, bothal will spill olllll ower sarong and pront seat and your wehical will ismell like Dematagoda Distillary plant until February!

Ok now going back to sit on paduru bepore that drunken monkey Nil Batta pinises ol the coconut wine.

Dishum Dishum (falalalala la la la la - hic!)
Gossip Aiya